the dear john letter

Dear Alkaline Trio,

I'm sorry, but I think we need to break up, despite what your song "We Can Never Break Up" may suggest.

It's just that, I don't know, I just don't feel how I used to about you, about us, about me and my feelings for you. Sure, it all started well enough, but the truth is, we were young. We didn't know much about true love. I was a sixteen year old kid with wide eyes and a narrow view of the world. I was angst-ridden, always looking for something to rebel against, and a younger you coincided with my youth well.

When I first heard "Radio," I thought about my bitterness towards the girls who had jilted me, and I related with you. When "Bleeder" first clicked for me, I heard your broken-hearted screams, and I came to the rescue. It seemed as though we were meant for each other. You were up beat and jolly on the surface but dark and broken underneath. I could relate to that. We wore the same facade.

But somewhere down the line, maybe between Good Mourning and Crimson, we started to grow apart. Maybe we just matured differently. Maybe we just ran out of things to say to each other. That can't be it, though, because I feel as though true love does not always require words. When all the conversation is stripped away, true love can sit in silence. I could not do that with you. So maybe that perceived relation was never there to begin with. Who knows?

I mean, every once in a while, I'm still reminded of why I fell in love ("Every Thug Needs a Lady," "Fatally Yours," "Burn"), but mostly, I can't help but feel that you try too hard to be what you used to be ("Mercy Me," "The Poison," "Blue in the Face"), and when you're not doing that, you're desperately trying too hard to be something new ("Prevent this Tragedy," "Smoke").

But who am I to judge? I've made the same mistakes myself. I just think I need something new in my life. I think we do. It's not like we don't have the past to remind us of the good times. I'll always have Goddammit. I'll always have "Clavicle" and "97." I'll never look at those times with regret, they were integral to my growth as a person.

But having heard what you've been planning on ("In Vein"), I just can't go on hurting us both. This really is going nowhere.

I apologize for any pain I've caused, but it just has to be this way.

I'll call you, don't call me.

Love always,
Tim Gomez